Sherlock Bones (Volumes 1-2)
The useless, non-ace detective, who comes free with Dr Whoson. Forced to move away from Baker Street due to the cost of rent, Bones and Whoson live in a top floor flat at Carol Vorderman House, Romford, and are always on hand to investigate whatever it is Des and Mick need investigating. Due to their Ford Cortina currently being out of action, they race to the scene of the crime by bus. Bones is good at one thing, though - playing the double bass.

Dr Whoson (Volumes 1-2)
The hyper-intelligent, and completely bald, assistant to Sherlock Bones. He has appalling dress sense. Whoson does all the work on their investigations while Bones takes the credit. However due to recent lack of cases to solve, Bones and Whoson now fill their spare time by running their own record company.

Arty Morty (Volumes 1-2)
Sherlock Bones's evil arch enemy.

Undercroft Bones (Volume 2)
Sherlock Bones's even more idiotic brother. Despite being a complete buffoon, he has seems to have a lot of friends in high places. He also likes his food - a lot.

The Village Idiot (Volume 2)
No one really knows who the Village Idiot is, or where he comes from. Only one thing is certain - he's an idiot!

Mike the Manic Mechanic (Volume 2)
South London garage proprietor and singer in rock band.

Other characters